Extended family vs. Nuclear family.

Pakistani society is composed of different societal cultures. But always tagged and declare this society as Islamic society. In Pakistan two family system are running like other societies e.g. joint / extended or nuclear family system. Parents lived with their children and grand children are called joint or extended family system. This is very influential system in Pakistani society. In extended family system married siblings (with children) also lived with parents and unmarried siblings. Extended family system is followers of old school of thoughts, where nuclear family system assume a disgraced for society. Extended family system used to run by older family member. Nuclear family system; where couple lived alone or with their children. This system is very famous in western society.

Nuclear family system is considered a vagrant or careless system in Pakistan.
Pakistani society kept all those societal norms that were practicing before partition, especially by Hindus. Due to this adoption, after partition, extended family system also known as noble family system. Past to till now, our ancestor always show resistance towards nuclear family system. Although in Islam there is no prove for liking this (joint ) system. But these are the old thoughts of our ancestors that can hardly get changed. Usually in Pakistan parents have 4 to 6 children whom lived with their parents, grandparents and siblings of their father. In this system, freedom of choice is very rare. Only elders make the decisions of the family. Moreover , there is no concept of privacy and have small homes, where big family members are strict to live together. Few families who are rich (landlord), posses big home, successfully run this system.
Many flaws are seen in extended family system. Young couple who have 1 or 2 children dislike the system of kinship . And sharing of everything. Like giving the specific amount of money from their salary for home expenses. A girl who recently joined new home feel more discomfort than nuclear system . Her dreams for new life gone in to vain. They should be accountable in front of every elder person. Result of these rigid norms can seen in shape of family disputes like Mother n law conflict with Daughter n law, poor man (husband) failed to patch up. If they go against them family called them rebellion. All hatred becomes a part of the newly-wed couple. They even unable to nourish their children according to their own wish. The worst part of this extended family system which also condemn in Islam; woman must sit with their brother n laws and other male members. She can’t do anything according to her own wish. Unfortunately, family members trying to emotional black mail opponent parties via tagging extended family as Islamic system.
Why you are not getting married or becoming a mother or dad, are common slogans that are used in extended family system. Further these give birth to different frustration and mental agony .Where everyone desperate to know each and everything even either the couple do sex after their marriage or not. Eating ice cream in late night becomes a controversial issue. But many couple and elders who are still happy to adjust with each other. But after babies mostly want separate home and privacy which is not fulfilled in the joint system.
Nuclear family system is free from all above disputes. This is a system of independency and where everyone can freely move with fewer rules. Although there are rules and regulations too like above system but in these children are accountable to their parents only. In this system if anyone wants their own family he/she should earn. This develops responsible behavior in whole family.
In short, extended family system prevails the concept of dependency and with this everyone tries to get benefit from this. They rely on other’s money and make fun for interfering others life. Many even don’t take any step on their own like doing job, selecting school for their children and living alone. Despite this, nuclear family system is very good where children rely on their parents at certain stage. In other words, if the newly-wed couple strict to live separate home this step would later cut down family conflicts. Nuclear family system is getting more favoritism in Islam because of its fruitful benefits. In many Islamic countries percentage of nuclear family system is increased. And turkey is one of them. Now it’s the time to change our old and rigid norms that caused conflicts and psychological problems. Because those rules and norms are successful that made for people’s will.

Sorry my soldiers are not solely born for dying.

On April 7, 2012 avalanche hit the Pakistani army base near the disputed area Siachen glacier (Gyari).138 soldiers were victim of this human made disaster. Many ecologists, metro -logiest said that this incident has happened because of global warming and both countries (Pakistan and India) are responsible for this. According to metro logiest and army soldiers it was not the weather (spring) of avalanche. It was beyond our expectations. And it is the biggest disaster in Siachen base . From the incident to till now, unfortunately the situations becoming bad to worse. Every new second, new sheet of ice covered the glacier. And the digging area has filled with ice sheet. The situation is going pathetic. But solute to our brave soldiers who never lose heart and putting their best effort.
Soldiers having credible abilities who don`t know what is rest. Moreover, buried soldiers are their colleagues. They know how is the feeling of the son and daughter, when they heard their father is `` buried alive in snow. How is the feeling of the mother and father about their son, siblings for their brother and wife for their husband? How they sleep with the feeling of discomfort either they can ever seen their loved ones or not. This feeling made the soldiers active in the brutal temperature of the winter , where we can`t imagine to live. Soldiers know the value of life better than other.
Yesterday I received the message, that compels me to write this article.
A poem by a soldier,
(Dedicated to all martyrs of Siachen)
If I die in a warzone, box me up and send me home.
Put my medals on my chest.
Tell my mom I did my best.
Tell my dad not to bow.
He won’t get tension from me now, tell my brother to study perfectly; keys of my bike will be his permanently,
Tell my sis not to be upset,
Her brother will not rise after this sunset ,
Tell my love not to cry…..because I am a solider born to die!
This message is so frequently forward to every number and soldier’s family must received this message too. Who gives people the right of hurting the emotions of distressed people? Who is already suffering through a big trauma of their life. Why we always think our thoughts are great and we can never hurt anybody? Why we tagged soldiers ; only born for die? Why we always have thirst of blood? Either it`s came from slum sectors of Karachi people, Peshawar and Baluchistan , Gilgat and other northern areas or any other city natives blood. Why we want to convey this message to India and other`s to look our country where daily many people have died and still we need more blood . But now the blood must came from soldiers. Why we all are insane? Why we are always ready for calling a martyred person. Either we are died in bomb blast or any accident (road or any disaster). Why we don’t wish to fulfill the true meaning of martyred through defending their country’s sovereignty (fought against non-Muslim).
Sorry but now I don’t need any blood I want my soldiers to be alive why I declare buried alive soldiers to be dead. I have a hope and want this hope in the eyes of every person of my country. Soldiers are not solely born for die; they can defend country as a doctor, engineer, technological personnel etc too. Why I tell my coming soldiers you are joining Pakistan forces and one day you must die. The point I am trying to make here is to declare anybody dead without any evidence is shameful act. And tag soldiers born for die is humiliating act. Kindly stop boosting fear among new generation about forces. People are paranoid at this extreme they make videos of this concept too. One of the video I had seen is about the story of the soldier who belongs to poor family moreover he was recently married and after one month he was died in a war. Pakistani masses brain nourishing about forces is very wrong. Many young soldiers must have a fear before joining forces, I don’t want to die because I am young. I also want to serve my country so what will I do?
In nutshell, life of soldiers is not as cheap as we think. They join army for the security of their country but if the county’s soldiers are rapidly dying so it’s time to take action against this. Hope is always better. When many people can survive from the disaster of earthquake so why shouldn't from this avalanche. When our soldiers who are constantly trying to save the lives of other soldiers so why we are assuming they are dead. This is a time to stand with army please not discourage their wills and support them through messages through media. I saw tears of many people who’s loved ones lost the battle of life. Now I am no more stronger to see tears of hundreds of people. This is human made disaster not a natural disaster. Earlier I told global warming is root cause of this (india and Pakistan )both are responsible . Why only Pakistani soldiers became victim ? Mind it; our soldier’s life is not cheap that we easily lost them. Already thousands hunted of NATO war and in Northern areas. Now it's time to stop this bloodshed. In last, a nation who stand up together in difficult times never be let down by any one. This is best time to tell we love our soldiers they are not born solely for dying.

Is Mathira only accused?

Fashion week 3 held in Karachi. People always remind this FW because of unfortunate blunder. The story was; Mathira who were wearing Sanam chaudry`s dress . The dress she was wearing; with orange sleeves, white top and white mini shorts. On the ramp ,when Mathira was wearing that dress unfortunately, her dress top fell down. And her front became naked in front of hundred people who were there. Without any feeling of embarrassment Mathira finished her ramp successfully. After this ,Mathira tweets this about the incident `` Yeah so what if my top fell down. Shit happens at fashion week. ``. She also said it`s just mistake that could happen with anyone.
After this, many controversy and gossip are echoing in the media news. People debating either it was dress malfunction or intention. Before knowing the reality behind this, people conclude this it was because of Mathira because her past record justifying this act. Mathira is glorious host currently working on the Youngsters channel AGG. Before this she was hosting on the love indicator on the channel vibe. She get hype because of her versatile hosting and gestures. Mathira is also known as a bold girl or Gujje Gujje girl. On the media news everyone eagerly wrote on the Mathira character . Moreover people started comparison her with actress Veena mailk.
Dress owner Sanam Chaudry who must give clarification of that dress. I like Mathira straight forward attitude this is the part of Ramp . In short if you dare to wear that sort of dress. So you should have a patience of bearing these flaws .Many people love to watch fashion weeks. Many people saw Mathira act on YouTube for many times.
None of the fashion shows portraying the culture of Pakistan or Islam. All their purpose is to promote fashion and establishing their names on international fashion. So how we expect it should be some limit or else.
I just want to convey the message to people of Pakistan through this article please for God sake spare religion from all these acts. We are not acting anything that calls us a good Muslim. Moreover, designers Sanam Chaudry have to say sorry and admit her mistake. There should be code and conduct for fashion designers. Fashion industry of Pakistan is prevailing vulgar culture of fashion. Fashion show objective, to sell the dresses not to displaying the naked bodies of woman. This is highly insensitive and offensive strategy of selling any dress or product. Veet ad (woman product) is another worst example of this strategy.
If Local theater could be banned on the vulgar dances so why not the fashion designers for designing inappropriate dresses. Because the owners and actors of theatre belongs to lower class and fashion industry personnel belongs to elite class. Sanam chaudry and Mathira is not solely responsible for this act. All fashion industry either designer`s or models or photographers is responsible. Why they remain silent over this shame act. Why they don`t raise voice? Why we all inane?
In nutshell, not a single person is responsible for any act. Either it`s in the case of Mahira khan, Mathira or any other. Actually we jeopardize our good norms. Don`t be judgmental and analyze the situation as a neutral.

Switch off the old trends of nail colors .

2011 was the year of dark nail paints. Almost all the women were wearing dark red, dark orange, dark pink or shocking pink. Either it was summer or winter everyone was wearing these dark shades. Even those who are not too much obsessed of nail paints, must had these two shades dark red or maroon and orange. Natural nail lover have never be disappointed. French nails always more attracted and inn. If the yearly catalog of 2011 nail paints take a look, it would be observed, yellow, blue, green ,blues were inn but all focus of the brands of nail colors is on dark shades.
In Pakistan brands of nail paints are always focused on dark shades. Earlier only few brands were famous like Medora (made by swat. Pakistan ) Revlon, Swiss miss (made by Pakistan ). Industry of nail paint in Pakistan had more interest towards darker shades. Lighter were inn but in sparkling shades. Moreover , in 80`s and in 90`s woman were not much crazy about the nail paints.
As the mood of fashion industry revolved, innovation and creativity also seen in nail industry. More shades of nail paints have been seen in market. After a long span of time, in 2010 and 2011 woman were likely to wear darker shades. Fashion industry is boosted at this extent , woman of this era is more fashion obsessed . Simple black pin turned to luxurious branded pin ,to simple 300 lawn shirt to 900 designer wear. So why shouldn`t nail color.
Nail fashion or nail art is always influenced girls or woman. Moreover, Media played the role of brunt to fire in nail industry. It`s not a expensive fashion. Prices can vary to its brand. The averages nail color worth 40 or 80 PRPS. After playing with dark colors now it`s time to fun with some light ,creamy and beige colors. Let’s take a look on brands who is offering these shades. Essie nail brand have a wide variety of these colors. pink-a-boo and she`s beauty perfect is new colors of this brand .Moreover,Princess Kate used Essie allure nail color on her big day.



Golden rose also offering many creamy beige colors .Forested natural, beige, soft pink peach medium pink and many others. Most important this brand is easily found. Luscious also offering some colors that belongs to the family of beige or creamy shades. Luscious is not an old brand, recently come in cosmetic world, but its nail paint are very long lasting. So woman can wear it without any fear of losing it`s shades in two or three days. Inn colors of luscious; Purple Haze, diamond finish, pale creamy pink. But the best shade of luscious that I personally like is their shine top coat.




Sweet touch is another renewed brand, more focus on darker shades. It gave the creamy and shinning looks to nails after one coat. Farmasi also another famous brand providing variety of creamy shades. on farmasi nail enamel rather the name of shades you can found the number of colors. 40 farmasi color which I mostly used in last autumn. The most important and cheapest brand of Pakistan ; Medora and Swiss miss. These brands are easily accessible to Pakistanis. Cheapest and affordable characteristic make them famous in Pakistan. Swiss miss and Medora also have some beige and creamy colors but in very few .
Although, I don`t write about all the brands available in Pakistan. Here is a bird’s eye view of the colors that are INN in 2012. 2012 is year of creamy beige colors but many girls and woman you still seen wearing dark colors. If you like nail art then you can use dark colors with beige creamy shades. In last, for low budget viewers, here is a tip for you. If you are too much conscious of fashion . So just buy good brand nail paints. Because it is more long lasting, one good brand nail paint lasts more months than others. Good brand nail paints cost 180 to 500 PRPS. Also apply nail paints before buying. If you feel it have watery image, so don`t `buy it, either it would famous brand. In Pakistan, copy nail paint is very inn in market. It is my personal experience, I buy famous brand nail paint, from the famous stores of Islamabad and Rawalpindi . So beware of the fake nail colors. Soon I will discuss good creamy beige color in detail . So girls best of luck for shopping. Have fun………..

New promotion ad of PTI.

Chairman PTI Imran khan is unpredictable man. He knows how to advertize his political party. Extensive use of `` electronic media`` in promotion campaign of any political party has never seen before.
PTI has made new promotion ad, which left all political leaders in distress. Imran khan is very much successful in capturing the votes of young blood. Every propaganda against PTI is in vain. Although PTI is still not very strong political party like PPP and PML-N. But every concept of PTI is a reflection of mature minds ,those are running this small party. None of PTI member shown violent or aggressive behavior in any program. PTI is today`s age political party, who communicate with their members via social networking sites and mobile messages.
PTI set-up is entirely different from other`s. PTI has firm believe on pure inclusive rights .PTI jalsa is also known as people`s jalsa. The best example of PTI`s jalsa was at Islamabad on Ramadan Mubarak, where people open their fast and offer their prayer with their leader. So it won`t be wrong to say PTI is a participatory political party.
Anyhow, PTI`s new promotion ad that again succeeds in garbing the hearts of his followers. Interestingly, his standing posture in promotion ad is like the commander or leader who came for letting down all corrupt leaders. Again he proved his opponents that he holds unique leadership qualities. Directly asking from masses, who they want, is their leaders in PTI is highly appreciable act. New promotion ad of PTI , succeed in reviving their annoying followers, who were angry with IK on joining of old politicians in his party. In reality, the tsunami of people and his massive popularity is because of IK unique and eye-catching tactic. PTI new promotion ad can easily hypnotize people.
Moreover, in this promotion ad, Imran khan himself talks to his followers directly, must give a straight hype to his party. With the broadcast of new promotion ad of PTI, opponent parties must thinking now we should bring a new idea for our promotion that is more unique and more influential than IK.
Imran khan clearly knows Pakistani people are tired of the ancestor’s politics. Imran khan is new hope for Pakistani people. Imran khan`s entrance in politics has been changed the mood of politics of Pakistan. Now politician start thinking beyond the readymade boundaries of politics. Everyone trying to defeat IK and making polices for catching young masses.
In nutshell, demands of 2012 is different, Imran khan is fulfilling the demands of new age. He hires highly experience and capable people for his party. Azeem Ibhraim was named as one of the Top 100 Global Thinkers of 2009 by the LSDP European Social Think Tank. IK has appointed him as a strategic policy advisor who would develop polices. IK is very much clear and determined about the future of PTI. Any propaganda cannot let him down towards his goal.

Tradition of ``Bacha Posh``

Meena ki khannyina was a famous thought provoking cartoons. This was developed by UNICEF especially for south Asian countries. Its aim was to create awareness among the masses of the south Asian countries about the gender equality, health, education cleanliness etc. In these cartoons , keeping in view the gender discrimination of south Asian countries, Meena is playing the leading role. And trying to tell the villagers with the help of her brother Raju and parrot that girls can do everything like boys. So the point, I am making here is gender equality. That is hardly practicing in south Asian countries. Gender equality in simple words is both genders (men and women) must have equal rights in every field of life without any discrimination. And every gender is equally valuable to society.
In south Asian countries, boys are preferred over girls, parents mostly pray for the birth of son. For the birth of son, parents can do anything. Gender discrimination is very common in south Asian countries. Still boys are considered bread winner. Parents of boys are considered privileged. Having a son is a symbol of proud there. Gender discrimination caused different frustration, tension and harassment in social and economic sector. The worst condition of gender discrimination can be seen in Afghanistan.
In Afghanistan gender discrimination is widely practicing. The tradition of gender discrimination is also known in Afghanistan as Bacha Posh or disguising girls as boys. According to the rigid custom or tradition of Afghanistan, if the parents don`t blessed with son, the girls are dressed up like boys. Parents cut their girls hair like boys. Parents of girls rather than boys are considered very poor. Girls get their feminist look back at the age of 17 or 18. The later life of girls are very though there, because they don`t know how the girls live.Moreover, Fauzia koofi is the only woman who was the elected Afghan parliament's first female deputy speaker (2005).